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You Blew the Meeting – But Do You Know Why?

Tips to deal with the four main personality types

by Anthony Parinello, Wall Street Journal best-selling author of
Selling to VITO, the Very Important Top Officer, and creator of: 97 Days to Sales Mastery

Sometimes, what we don’t know really can kill the sale. Take the subject of personality styles. Salespeople typically ignore the personality styles of their prospects. By doing so, they unintentionally offend those prospects.

Ignoring your prospect’s personality style is a fatal error. It’s one of those unfortunate situations where not knowing what you don’t know really can sabotage your sales efforts. Once you make even an innocent mistake in this vitally important area, the odds are that you’ll never get invited back again – without ever knowing the reason for your exile.

This is definitely an area worth learning about. Here’s the scoop: There are four distinctly different personality styles; each of us has a primary and a secondary style. Dr. David Merrill made this initial discovery back in the early and middle1960s; he studied salespeople to develop what has become a cornerstone assessment in psychological studies.

According to Dr. Merrill, you and I – and every other human on planet earth capable of communicating – can be assigned to one of the following four categories.

Personality Style #1: The Driver

Dr. M found a particular set of individuals that he chose to call “drivers.” These people are all about authority and taking action. These are fast-moving people. These people have two speeds: stop, and full speed ahead.

Drivers are “get-it-done” kind of people. You can usually pick them out of a crowd. The Driver motto is: “Lead, follow, or get out of the way!” Know anybody like that? Sure you do.

When dealing with Drivers, DO say:

“What’s your opinion about X?”

“Which one of these (benefits/results/topics) is of the greatest importance to you during (specific timeframe)?”

“Have I understood you correctly about …?”

“We’re sure …”

“We can …”

“It would be an honor to …”

“May I have your permission to …?”

Whatever you do, DON’T say this to the Driver:

“Did you know?” (Always assume Drivers know everything.)

“Were you aware of?” (Always assume Drivers are aware of everything.)

“Let me tell you …” (Don’t tell a Driver what to do!)

“I want to …” (Who cares what you want?)

“In my opinion …” (When a Driver wants your opinion, you’ll know.)

Personality Style #2: The Expressive

These folks are all about establishing connections between people and explaining things. They love to be in the action, in the limelight. They love to talk.

If there is something going on in the office, a party or a happy hour or a picnic, these are the people who are usually putting it together. They’re focused on social interactions. They are personable, gregarious, expressive people. You will make headway and connect with them most easily when you realize that they value relationships above just about everything else.

When dealing with Expressives, DO say:

“How would you do X?”

“Have you ever thought about X?”

“How do you feel about X?”

“What can I do to help you X?”

“Just between you and me …”

“You seem like you have a lot of experience with …”

Whatever you do, DON’T say this to the Expressive:

“That’s not really relevant …”

“That’s only available for (larger-preferred-other) customers.”

“That’s outside of my area of responsibility.”

“We can’t …”

“That’s not available …”

“I can only …”

“(Someone else) will take care of that for you.”

Personality Category #3: The Amiable

The main thing you should know about Amiables is that they do not like change. They tend to be very cautious. They like other people to get out onto the thin ice first. They are not risk takers, and they don’t like to upset the apple cart and they’re not big on making any type of decision.

These are “status quo” individuals. They are certainly not the movers and shakers that a Driver or an Expressive tends to be. These people are all about minimizing risk, and you are going to gain points with them when you show them how to avoid taking chances that in their estimation would be unacceptable. Never pressure an Amiable to make an independent decision. That’s far too risky.

When dealing with Amiables, DO say …

“Together, we can …”

“Do you feel it would make your boss/colleague/sponsor happy to know that …?”

“Can I ask for your input/help?”

“Can you help me understand what your feelings are about …?”

“What’s the safest way to …?”

“Let’s not gamble on …”

“Let’s not risk …”

“Let’s not take chances on …”

Whatever you do, DON’T say this to an Amiable:

(Any direct question that ignores the person’s input, feelings, and thoughts.)

“Don’t worry about that …”

“Do you want me to …?” (Giving people instructions is much too risky!)

“What would you like me to do next?” (Ditto!)

“I’ll leave it up to you.” (Anything … anything but that!)

Personality Style #4: The Analytic

Analytics are all about accuracy. They are focused on spotting mistakes and addressing potential problems before they come up. In the scientific and engineering communities, the analytics are the kings and queens of the realm.

These people always need to see more information. They might as well come from Missouri, the “show me” state. They want to know the right answer beyond a shadow of a doubt.

When dealing with Analyticals, DO say:

“I’ve personally confirmed X.” (And be able to back it up with hard data!)

“We are certain of X.” (And be able to back it up with hard data!)

“Our research proves X.” (And be able to back it up with hard data!)

“Let’s leave no stone unturned.”

“Let’s make sure all the T’s are crossed and all the I’s are dotted.”

Whatever you do, DON’T say this to an Analytic:

“Approximately X.”

“Roughly X.”

“I’m not sure about X.”

“Maybe.”

“Perhaps.”

“I’ll try to find out …”

“I don’t know.”

Now here’s your challenge.

Communicate most effectively with members of the four groups - and, as a salesperson, you will run into all four – you must know your OWN personality style. I invite you to learn this right now - before another deal goes down the tubes because of something you didn’t know that you didn’t know!

Anthony Parinello is a Wall Street Journal best-selling author of Selling to VITO, the Very Important Top Officer and creator of 97 Days to Sales Mastery (www.hotshotselling.com).

To learn more about best-selling sales author Anthony Parinello and his online course “97 Days to Sales Mastery,” visit www.hotshotselling.com, or call 1-800-777-VITO.